• Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Nav Social Menu

    • Email
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Pinterest
    • Twitter

Rosie Villodas

  • Celebrations
    • Christmas
    • Parties
    • Thanksgiving
    • Kids Birthdays
  • Travel
    • Disney
    • Disney Cruise
    • Disney Food
  • Self Care
    • Reflection
  • Lifestyle
    • Inspiration
      • Details
    • Parenting
  • Faith
    • Spiritual Formation
    • Family Rhythms
    • Kids Faith

03/18/2010 · 4 Comments

Surviving Motherhood

Lifestyle· Parenting

Surviving Motherhood 2

A friend of mine who just became a new mom, recently stated that she was “desperately seeking a return to normalcy.” Karis is 10 months old now and the first thing that popped into my head was…. “SO AM I…!!!” I was totally empathizing with her. Will it ever “get better?”

Don’t get me wrong. I love my daughter, and ironically, I can’t imagine not having her around. But still, something inside me misses being able to do as I please without the responsibility of caring for an infant. I miss getting up and going… just going. No bags to pack, no breast milk or formula to remember, etc., etc., etc. I wake up when I want, I go to sleep when I want. If I want to make a quick run to Starbucks I just wanna go! No feeding, dressing, changing, burping, or any other “ing” associated with babies and their care. I JUST WANNA GO!!!

What if I wanna take some classes? Go back to work? Attend a workshop? Take a walk? Take a shower? Will I ALWAYS have to have baby in tow and/or look for daycare that costs as much as a BMW? When will things go back to normal? Will they EVER go back to normal?

Then the answer hit me like a ton of bricks… No. Things will never be the same as they were before Karis. I sit and let that thought marinate….  I thought to myself, “Life as you have known it, Rosie, will never be the same again.” For about 6.25 seconds I sank into a state of moderate depression.

I had a choice then to just sit and sulk and throw a pity party. Of which I happen to throw the best pity party in the western hemisphere (my personal opinion). But no, I resolved not to sulk, to put away the streamers and balloons of the “poor me” party and create a NEW NORMAL.

Perhaps you feel the same as I do, overwhelmed at becoming a new mom. But here is one thing I’m learning and want you to remember anytime you are feeling overwhelmed…

Your new life as a mom is so different and challenging but that doesn’t mean it can’t be great.

Surviving Motherhood

My daughter has brought so much joy to my world. She’s a great responsibility and I want to make sure I am the best mom I can be for her. So as a new mother I’ve been learning what MY “New Normal” is. It’s a work in progress and is evolving with every new day and new challenge that comes my way. But it’s exciting to be able to explore this “new normal” and to experience all of it’s twists and turns.

So, as you begin creating your great new mom life, it’s helpful to remember these things:

1. Motherhood Isn’t Either/Or, It’s Both/And.

Many times, as new parents we experience a hard day or week and become disillusioned because this was “not how we imagined it to be.” We saw other people’s pictures and stories and think, that’s the way it always is. Or we just don’t anticipate how hard the hard days may actually be.

Some of us parents can take the opposite stance. We imagine a lot of hard days and sacrifice. We think we won’t be able to do the things we once love to do. Or we may think, “I can’t just pick up and go anymore, I’ve lost my freedom!”

One thing we must realize if we want to not just survive motherhood but thrive is that it isn’t either/or, it’s both/and.

Motherhood is both hard work and easy-going, both fun and boring, both full of joy and anxiety, both laughter and sadness, both challenging and simple. Motherhood is a paradox. There are really high highs and can be some really low lows too. And guess what? That is ok.

Being ok with that truth is what will help you build the foundation for your fantastic new mom life.

2. Adjust Your Expectations.

Building on the momentum that embracing the “Both/And” mentality has brought you, begin reimagining what some of your days will be like. We need to begin accepting and embracing the unpredictability of schedules and things going as planned. They almost always won’t go your way. And that’s ok. Learn to be ok with that. Begin to roll with the punches, so to speak.

This doesn’t mean we try to create schedules and make plans. It simply means that we hold those schedules and plans with a loose grip. This is hard for me. But if I hold to tight to plans I will quickly become frustrated and miserable when they change.

Once we begin to shift our mindset, adjust our expectations and embrace flexibility, our perspective of daily life with our baby will change.

3. Own Your Power to Create

I believe we are all made in the image of God. And our Creator God has endowed you with power, through Christ, to create as well. Take a hold of and harness that power to shape the life you want to live with your family. If you loved to travel as a single or married person, adjust your travel expectations and then travel with your baby. If you used to love to get all glammed up and dressed up, adjust your expectations for getting on time to things and get your pretty on!

Every day won’t be easy. In fact, most days won’t be easy. But keep seeking closure, adjusting expectations and then own your power to create the life you want. Trust that the Lord is with you every day. Because He is. You aren’t alone. You got this, mama.

0 shares
  • Share
  • Tweet

Don’t miss out!

Next Post: Tangled Party Ideas »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Rick says

    03/21/2010 at 3:05 am

    Great post, honey! You're the best! Keeping shipping!!!

    Reply
  2. Rick says

    03/21/2010 at 3:07 am

    I mean, keep shipping! =) keeping shipping doesn't really communicate what I'm trying to say. Love u.

    Reply
  3. Angie22PR says

    03/21/2010 at 5:52 am

    Prima… I admire your courage to say this kind of things… I'm sure a lot of moms go through this… but few talk about it. I gotta say to me is a big factor in deciding when and if I have a baby in the next couple of years. Not only I"m scare of "loosing myself"… I'm scare of the stress factor in my life. Military life is very complex and living in CA, away from family members, makes it worse. I have learn to trust God and as my husband and I build strong bonds as a married couple we contemplate every aspect of having a brood… Thanks for sharing this… because it affirm what we already figure, having a baby is not to be taking lightly, no matter how cute they are :PWe will continue to wait in our Lord and when the time comes… I'm sure he'll be my support like he is yours right now…Take care… Angie

    Reply
  4. Life26 says

    04/17/2010 at 10:51 pm

    Heyy!! I'm the new mom that said that! I'm famous, woo hoo! lol When you wrote that you were still looking for a return to normalcy 10 months after delivering Karis, I initially was like "Oh no, this will never end!" and was getting ready to throw my own pity party! But by the end of your blog, you put things into perspective for me and I totally am looking forward to creating the "new normal". 🙂 Thanks for the encouragement! … gotta go, the little munchkin just started crying. ahh!!

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recipe Rating




This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

Search

Meet Rosie

Hi, I'm Rosie!

Welcome to my blog. I'm a former Children's Pastor and a self-proclaimed "Miscellaneous Creative" who loves creating, finding and carving out space for beauty in life.

My hope is that this will be a place where you too can be inspired and encouraged to live a beautiful life! Read More…

Stay up to date

Categories

Footer

All you need is love. And coffee. Must have coffee.

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
Bonding with my 13 year old. I got a little carrie Bonding with my 13 year old. I got a little carried away. 🥰⁣
⁣
#crocs #icedmatchalatte #goldensnitch
It’s here! My audiobook is here! 🤗 It’s here! My audiobook is here! 🤗
💐Happy Birthday to my beautiful Mother @milagro 💐Happy Birthday to my beautiful Mother @milagrosv !🥳⁣
⁣
The world is a more beautiful place because you are in it. We celebrate you today on your birthday and wish you joy. May you know how much you are loved and celebrated always.⁣
⁣
Love you!💗
Happy Father’s Day to my love @richvillodas !!! Happy Father’s Day to my love @richvillodas !!! 💙

We appreciate the hard working, fun loving, hug giving, amazing dad you are.

Thanks for loving me and our kids so well. We love you!
🌟🌟🌟
🌸 A peony for your thoughts… 🌸 ⁣ ⁣ “ 🌸 A peony for your thoughts… 🌸 ⁣
⁣
“Consider the [peonies]; ⁣
They don't toil nor spin ⁣
And there's not a king with more splendor than them” Luke 12:27✨⁣
⁣
📷: me @rosievillodas
Peony | 05.28.22⁣ ⁣ 📷: Yours truly @rosievi Peony | 05.28.22⁣
⁣
📷: Yours truly @rosievillodas ⁣
⁣
#flowersofinstagram
These days… Sabbath is for local farmers market These days… Sabbath is for local farmers market hauls | rainy afternoons | & enjoying new blooms in the garden after an afternoon rain-shower. 🌦🌺⁣🌦
⁣
The Lord is here.⁣ 🙏🏽⁣
⁣
#selah #sabbath  #delight #contemplative
Last Sunday @nlfnyc New Life, @richvillodas and I Last Sunday @nlfnyc New Life, @richvillodas and I spoke about what passing down faith to the next generation might look like for us as the church. 💒

In it, I shared a letter to the younger generation at NLF (What I would have wished someone said to me back when I was 13-ish). And we also shared some words over the congregation at large.

I posted this letter and these words on my website for those who were asking for it. ☺️

See the link in my bio to read all the words! 🔗🤗
My husband @richvillodas knows how much I love tea My husband @richvillodas knows how much I love tea. And so he brought me back some wonderful gifts, treats and teas from @bettys in Harrogate, England! ⁣
⁣
Love their Tea Room Blend!⁣
☕️🫖💗⁣
⁣
#tea #bettys
Ended last night with some delicious ramen @ippudo Ended last night with some delicious ramen @ippudo ! 🍜
So excited to be watching The Lion King on Broadwa So excited to be watching The Lion King on Broadway today! 🦁⁣
⁣
@lionkingonbroadway
Thanks mom @milagrosv & Dad for your words in this Thanks mom @milagrosv & Dad for your words in this beautiful Mother’s Day Card!💐💖💐

Painted by @valleson (Dad)
We are incredibly proud of this beautiful woman ri We are incredibly proud of this beautiful woman right here. 👩🏽‍🎓 @mel__vee ⁣
⁣
Today she graduates with her PHD in Social Work! What an incredible accomplishment.⁣
⁣
Congratulations sister-in-law! 🍾🎊🎉🙌🏽🔥👩🏽‍🎓
Breakfast date with my love @richvillodas at @thef Breakfast date with my love @richvillodas at @theflourshoppecafe 🤩⁣
⁣
🍳The Egg Sammie⁣
🍞French Toast⁣
☕️1 coffee 1 tea⁣
⁣
I’m so glad we found this place. So yum! 😋⁣
⁣
#rockvillecentre #breakfast #dateday❤️
One of my favorite art pieces entitled “Beauty f One of my favorite art pieces entitled “Beauty for Ashes” by @lindsayletters.co ⁣
⁣
In honor of Resurrection Sunday and the song we sang at church today “Graves Into Gardens”. ⁣Thank you @nlfnyc worship team!🙏🏽⁣
⁣
“You turn mourning to dancing ⁣
You give beauty for ashes⁣
You turn shame into glory⁣
You’re the only one who can”⁣
⁣
#beautyforashes #ressurectionsunday #easter
Wishing my guy @richvillodas a very Happy Birthday Wishing my guy @richvillodas a very Happy Birthday today! 🥳😍🥳
Great Tea Time with my sister visiting from Arizon Great Tea Time with my sister visiting from Arizona! 🤍🤎🤍
We did a thing! 🎉🏡🎉⁣ ⁣ We bought a ho We did a thing! 🎉🏡🎉⁣
⁣
We bought a house and move in tomorrow!⁣
⁣
A big thank you to all the people who supported us in this wild ride of a journey.⁣
⁣
💖💖💖
Hey Parents! If you are looking for ways to observ Hey Parents! If you are looking for ways to observe Ash Wednesday or Lent with your children here are some ideas I put together.🕯(Link in bio)⁣
⁣
#Lent #AshWednesday #Christian
New fake account!⁣ ⁣ They are asking for $. Pl New fake account!⁣
⁣
They are asking for $. Please help report and block👉@richvillodas._
Load More... Follow on Instagram
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Contact

Copyright © 2023 · Rosie Villodas

0 shares